Tormented Sorrows

It's hard to know where to start with this review. Thank you to the author for making the download free. At first, I thought I was reading a comedy; some of the dialogue was hilarious. For example, 'Aye, make it quick. I’m knackered from my grief.' and 'Fuck off now. I’ve got more grieving and wailing to do.'

However, the comedic elements soon ended, and I realised this was meant to be a serious story. It's a hard read because it's at times awkwardly written, from the very wooden dialogue to the unnatural sequence of events. Parents worried about their daughter possibly lying dead in the woods do not stop for coffee.

Ultimately, I just didn't care about what happened to any of the characters. I believe there is a really good idea, and with a lot of revision, this could be a good story. Sadly, it currently doesn't work as one.

I appreciate the author giving this away for free, but I just didn’t connect with the story or the characters . The dialogue is very wooden and needs work to flow. The characters don’t seem to know how to relate to each other and often just sigh at weird moments.

I initially thought this was satire, but I quickly realized it isn’t. The bones are there for a good story, but sadly this is not it.